Smell That? It's the Stink of Fear

[Monica Vanzant]

Hello All,

I am tired. The research, articles, podcasts and blogs on investing. Tired. The videos of advice from hundreds of people all over the web. Tired. The googling of success stories and failure commentaries, the hundreds of different ways a deal can go great and also go straight down the tubes. Tired. After scouring the web for hours for transactional funding companies and state tax websites. Tired. The heady excitement I feel at three o'clock in the morning when I KNOW that I am NOW ready to start my wholesaling career and I'm going to start tomorrow and then tomorrow comes and I realize I have so much more to learn and I need to research the industry some more, so... - Yep, you got it. Tired.

I have wanted to move into real estate investment for years because I have always loved land, buildings, architecture and the overall real-estate business. But I have never had a desire to sell anything which is why I have never considered becoming a real-estate agent. So imagine my excitement when I discovered that flipping/wholesaling was a THING. The thought that I could get started by wholesaling with no cash, credit or license was perfect.

And so it began. I created my business name first, registered it in my state and ordered business cards. Then I began really studying and researching the industry. I put a copy of my downloaded beginners guide in a binder, carried it around like a real-estate bible. There was much to learn and I was an eager student.

Months later I purchased my domain name and created my website and started putting together a file of important notes about where and how to find buyers and sellers and calculators on how to come up with my numbers. And I kept researching - still learning really important stuff so I knew I still wasn't ready to start.

A few months after that I started on my business plan because this is very important when you start a business, right? And I kept studying, and studying, and...

And here it is, 18 months later and I still have not started or closed my first deal.

And now I know what tires me the most. Me. This irrational fear of getting started and I have no idea why. I mean, I know full well that I could fail but I also know me and my determination in everything else and I have never allowed fear to get in my way until this. So what is it about this industry that makes me so afraid? Could it be that the stakes seem high from the very beginning? Yes, I think so. It's not just the money. It's the fact that I have to deal with at least three other parties (the seller, buyer, bank and /or title company). These are a lot of people to make a fool of yourself in front of totally on your own.

And then there is you. All of you. The many members of Bigger Pockets who give your time, advice and knowledge to help everyone learn the business. Why are you all being so darned nice? Why are you folks always egging me on, making me believe in myself? Stop it already!

Well, I am done. Done being afraid. Done being tired. And done with being angry at myself for being so freaked out. I'm gonna find me a house to sell dammit! I don't even care if I fail. I just need to start. Now, I've got to go. It's almost three o'clock in the morning and I've got to get some sleep.

I'll keep you posted.