Found $873K, need help investing it

[Jim K.]

Bought a teardown at a tax auction, went in and knocked a hole in one of the kitchen walls, found three stud bays filled with plastic-wrapped used bills, mostly twenties but lots of fifties, hundreds. $873K total. There was a Glock lying on top of one of the stacks, bit rusted, been there a while.

How should I invest this money? Please help. I'm so confused.

[Joe Splitrock]

Your situation is more common than you may think. Lots of investors got started after finding money stuffed in walls. 

First bit of advice is don't touch the gun. If you did, wipe off any finger prints and dispose of the gun in the closest river. 

Second thing to realize is someone will be looking for that money. It may be 10-15 years before the come looking, but guaranteed they will be back. Finish the rehab quickly and sell the house.

Now the money is all yours! Here is how you make it grow:

1. Advertise publicly you have the money. This is the best way to attract investing advice. You will meet lots of nice people who are looking out for your best interests.

2. Hopefully you find some fist time syndicators or flippers that will agree to pay you huge returns. Is it risky? Yes, but do you want to get rich or what?

3. Avoid the stock market. Everyone knows real estate is the only guaranteed investment.

That is about it. Give your money to the first person offering great returns and watch it grow.