FOI (Fear Of Investment): How to Convince Wife Investing is Safe

[Philip Smith]

Short Introduction
I currently work full-time in a stable, but dead-end job.  I am a IT Technician for an automotive company.  Being a non-IT business, the pay is low, but I make due by fixing computers on the side and building websites and fixing websites for folks.  My wife and I have five children and we have no idea (grace?) how we make it each month.    

REI Experience == 0

I have been reading 3-5 books a month on real estate investment for the past few months and feel that I want to take the leap into REI. Particularly alluring is the prospect of multi-family property investment. Along the way, I've discovered a few snags in my plan (a loose plan currently, but it getting refined as I learn). I wish I could just blame my wife for the snags, but I too am inhibiting my progress. I have a small savings (~$5k) and over $100k equity in my home as a conservative estimate. I lived in my first home and netted ~$30k from its sale two years ago after enclosing the front porch to add to the living square footage and updating the place. Most of that $30k was used to update the AC, build a shed/workshop for my wife's carved wood item business that she recently started, dig a well for the sprinklers, remove a dead tree, and remodel the kitchen after a plumbing leak developed in the foundation of our home a few months after moving in.

Our Dilemma 
Now that our savings is basically depleted and any emergency we may have health-wise could wipe that out and accrue debt for us (I'm uninsured), it has motivated me to make a change.  I'll start with throwing my wife under the bus...  Our new house is in a great neighborhood and my wife does not want to sell the house to get the equity out of it.  She did compromise, however, by stating she may be down to live in an investment property for a time if we hold on to our house and move back in later.  That said, neither of us want a long-term renter in our house; we feel odd about someone calling it "home", but we don't mind the prospect of doing an Air-bnb or the like.  Another option is we stay in our home and just invest.  

Pain Points
The problem is acquiring the capital for the investment.  I literally just bought the Raising Private Capital book and will have it Wednesday, but my concern is risk.  I know you've all heard it before, but here are my major pain points:

- My wife is very hesitant about refinancing. She feels that the higher mortgage payment and taxes will hurt us because our budget is so darn tight currently. The investment would need to be larger (I feel) to provide enough income to hamper the pain of that cost hit. This same issue applies to a HELOC as well. I explained that if the market tanks, my employer may terminate me because IT is a necessary evil to them, but only when they need us.

-  Also, regarding the market tanking, how much fluctuation should one expect with rental income?  I think of asset value appreciation as a bonus and not a means to an end, but the rental income would be my bread and butter and I would be reliant on it as a source of income (much like the current job).

-  I do not have a mentor.  This is a biggy for me.  I have a hard time trusting people sometimes, but [admittedly] it has saved my butt more often than not.  I guess that's why I'm reaching out.  I want to hear what intelligent, trustworthy folk have to say.  I'm not looking for a hand out or a mentor, but any incite to finding one is sincerely appreciated.  **EDIT: just found out I can't ask for a mentor here, so I am rephrasing my last sentence to make sure I'm in compliance.**  

There are more pain points that I didn't list here, but I already feel as though I wrote a book (sorry!) and only have a few moments left of my lunch break, ha ha.  Thanks for reading this, if you made it this far.