Don that is a very tragic event I am sure he has not dealt with fully if he has turned to drugs.You can't just stop doing something.You have to replace it with something else to fill the space.WHITE KNUCKLING and WILL POWER will eventually only lead to failure.My mom worked for years and years at a violence center for women and dealt with people that had issues.You can guide them and try to show the way but at the end of the day it is their choice to want to live or die.Just take in every moment your son is present and in the moment with you and try to cherish those memories.Right now your main goal is to protect the innocent children and take away any bad modeling behavior they are witnessing that can impact them for life.When you kick a habit you have to do something else.Example: Smoking - Bike Riding,Drinking- going to church,drugs-exercise etc.Everyone has stress in their lives and that will never change.As we get older the stress does not go away it just transforms into something else.You might used to have worried about money,then it's your kids,then it's old age,mortality etc.Until your son sees a counselor to deal with these issues and learn coping skills he is going to medicate himself to not feel anything.The first few sessions of therapy is just small talk.The real work begins later on and either people commit and dig in to work on issues or say "Oh I am fine now and get scared and run away".Many people go to their pastor but I feel they are not qualified as a drug abuse specialist or a licensed therapist to help them with situations like that.Don you don't control your son but YOU DO control how you react to what he does and how it impacts your life and family.Maybe you feel guilty for him seeing his mom go through that and enabled him out of guilt to make yourself feel better in the moment.All you can do everyday is work on yourself.If you do that you can have a positive impact on him that can do nothing but help.

All parties need to be familiar with the process and willing to work in this way.You may also need a line of credit with vendors or otherwise as they may not be willing to release materials only to wait 30-45 days to get paid on them once the draw is paid out.Oh and dont forget about lien waivers, you have to get them to continue going forward, and so that the contractors cant put a materials or labor lien against the house.Spend some serious time with a skilled loan officer that has completed many of these, do not go to rookies on this one.Lastly, if you want to do this for it to end up as a rental, then plan on living there upon completion of the rehab, and then refinance the loan to a Fannie / Freddie non-owner occupied loan to convert it to a rental.

I managed to reach one of two personal references given and the referee, a medical doctor, had known one of them for twenty years and described them as very mature and responsible.So here is what I am minded to do: approve but ask for each of them to provide a parental guarantor so I have two parents on the line.

I would like to learn how to be more handy with home repairs and perhaps through rental properties I will gain skills in this area.

Most new folks drastically overestimate their skill at adding value on an active management approach and grossly underestimate the value of their time.  

Most investors under utilize our skills or just want us to look for properties with no real committment.

Usually in Real Estate, each sides brings one of these: money, property, skills, manpower, connections, knowledge. 

Are they old medical bills?

So during the day he went to "get coffee" and disappeared for an hour, then he had to "run to mom's house for medication" for 2 hours...signs of him doing multiple jobs and spreading everyone out.

- Are you okay with spending that 6 months mostly learning and building a skill where you can continue after you get a full-time job?