The other driver for an attached ADU is to sandwich in the external wall plumbing which has been giving me problem the past few winters here.  

I work as an Uber driver so it might be something I can incorporate!

Especially with Mad Tree taking over the old RockTenn.  

Brokers say unless you prequal everyone it's profiling and they don't want to take the chance they might make someone mad and they will go to another Brokerage.

A mortgage payment of 50% of your income is madness (in my opinion).  

BUT... he's got no website, no license as a lender (he's in Washington State, so I don't know if it's required to be licensed as a private lender there, no 1033 just the shortest application form I've ever seen that doesn't even ask for my social, just my driver's license number and a copy of my DL, and all no doc... no bank statements, no tax returns... no credit pull? 

Driver around all the streets and look for vacant houses.

There's no way to know whether a former/current landlord is being honest or vengeful, glad to be rid of the tenant or mad because they're losing a tenant.

For the last two months before the auction the owners ran a lawn sprinkler in the attic because they were so mad about the foreclosure. 

I can definitely see how in some cases your timeline is a HUGE driver, just as @Dev Horn pointed out as well.