Sometimes a good commerical Broker could come in and deal with the bank and or their captial markets.. 

In order to have checkbook control, the IRA account will need to be at a trust company that will allow the IRA to invest in an LLC (where you will be the manager and your IRA will be member - an as manager you will have checkbook access to the LLC bank account).

I refinanced it into a  5% 30-year mortgage with a local bank as the seller would only carry the loan for a year.

As I said, check with local banks and credit unions.

I would get on the phone with a local lender through a local bank. 

One thing to be aware of, and I hope that this never happens to any of you guys, is my connected bank link somehow failed or became disconnected?

No reserves and no cash flow = capital infusion from investors and/or return property to bank.  

He is also giving me a bad reputation with my bank.

It mostly means you don't want to deal with banks initially. 

Have you looked at an HML or a loan from a bank to buy it from the seller now?