How much involvement are you looking to have?  

I agree, but Vail is not involved.

I was hoping to structure a deal that involves paying the seller every month and then a balloon payment in 5 years (when I can get an 80% LTV cash out refinance to put a mortgage on the property without having to put any money down because I'll have built up at least 20%).

Since REPS is determined on a joint return basis, her active involvement and the combined hours can qualify you to offset your 2024 W-2 income with real estate losses, including losses from cost segregation and bonus depreciation on your remaining rentals.

A hybrid approach involves buying early and renting out units, then moving into one.

You might feel like the effort doesn't justify the cost, but she was involved on the initial showing and that's what demonstrates the agency between you two. 

So yes, to answer your question, I’m well prepared for whatever I get myself involved in.

When making offer based on ARV, is it good practice to have future cash refi lender get involved as early as possible (have their appraiser connected?)

That definitely helps explain things, but too messy for me to get involved personally.

Furthermore, would this require an ABA even though there is not ownership involved?