I can’t afford to pay him for a lousy job and stay on budget. 

Once that is identified, can you afford to achieve it and does it meet your expected return?

She can't afford rent, so you get her moved out by the end of the month, then apply her deposit to the unpaid rent, cleaning, and repairs.I may even incentivize her to leave quickly by offering to forgive the unpaid portion of rent if she gets out by the end of the month, but it really depends on a number of factors and I'm not going to ask for details.For future reference, best practice is to have set standards and adhere to them every time.

We could potentially afford a relatively good property, we have about $50K to $60K towards a down payment (not great, but good).

Money is getting tight and tenants are looking for what fits their budget, not the amenities they can afford. 

The tenant's finances determine what they can afford.

At a very base level, make sure the property is up to health and safety codes for your location. 

A lot of investors based in markets like New Jersey are choosing to purchase their investments OOS in the Midwest because of the affordability and numbers making more sense.

I know it depends on the policy, but the house is completely destroyed and cannot be sold, ive lost lots of money already and this is affecting my mental health.

With a 4% rate on the seller-financed deal, you'll want to compare current market rates to see if refinancing is affordable and makes sense.