So as far as hard money lenders go, I've been quoted as low as 7% interest (this changes daily), and they would even use the equity in my first home for the down payment on my 2nd property, this however is a last resort for me as i would prefer less risky financing.

Maybe you offer to put them up at Disneyland resort for three nights.Don't automatically assume there's a problem.

A refi on either of my rentals will give me a worse rate and higher monthly payments which I may have to resort to, but will take even more time after the HELOC is funded. 

A final resort could be to file an eviction, but of course, this should only be turned to if you feel like your other options won't work out. 

Skiing's not going anywhere. 

I've resorted to doing the things that I can by myself and holding off on the things that I cannot reasonably do.

We’re staying in that resort right now, and seriously considering purchasing our first STR here too.

Purchase price: $415,000 Cash invested: $130,000 An 1850's farmhouse duplex in Ski country as a "Vacation Home Hack", meaning that unit will be our vacation home and the other will be used as an STR.

About the location: the property is roughly 20 acres located near Henniker New Hampshire, about 90 minutes driving from Boston, close to a popular winter ski area and summer camping and vacationing area. 

I live in a small resort town with a massive income disparity.