I am drafting a speech and looking for a funny, short real estate joke to catch the audience right at the start.

We see exchanges that look like this frequently. 

https://www.biggerpockets.com/...12 Frequently Asked Questions (And Answers) About DSCR Loanshttps://www.biggerpockets.com/...8 More Commonly Asked Questions and Answers to DSCR Loanshttps://www.biggerpockets.com/blog/eight-questions-and-answe...What Documents Do You Need for a DSCR Loan?

Losses due to wind, hail and other forms of disaster are becoming more and more frequent.

https://www.biggerpockets.com/...12 Frequently Asked Questions (And Answers) About DSCR Loanshttps://www.biggerpockets.com/...8 More Commonly Asked Questions and Answers to DSCR Loanshttps://www.biggerpockets.com/blog/eight-questions-and-answe...What Documents Do You Need for a DSCR Loan?

A problem is this would frequently push loans above appraised values. 

I do think something like this is going to be more attractive to a specific audience,  so I'd do the work to analyze that piece of it - and consider other amenities at a similar investment level that might have broader appeal in that pro/con list. 

Not to mention hair salons clog drains on a frequent basis. 

is it frequently relevant.

In this case I simply advertise on the base newspaper which is super cheap given how frequently people come and go there are always reliable leads to be found.Or how about creating a simple "I Buy Houses" website and spend a few bucks to have it professionally made and SEO optimized?